Sorry I haven't really been keeping up... Even though no one really reads this anyways... I haven't had a lot on my mind lately. This Thanksgiving break was just filled with family drama and love and laughter and I am just...well... Happy!! I haven't felt this happy in a long time. Plus me' and the boyfriend are going through a new type of experience together which is exciting... And yeah. We are just happy together as well. I haven't been sick in a few weeks, and I have started eating gluten again with no problems. Things seem to be going up.. And my teenage years seem to be getting a little brighter. (:
Happy is a wonderful feeling... Let's hope it stays.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Gilda. :3
There is one thing I know I would NOT be okay without. She is about a foot and a half tall, 70 pounds, and wrinkly. She is an English bulldog, and her name is Gilda.
We got Gilda about 2 years ago from some friends of my moms who breed bulldogs. Gilda was only a year and a half years old, but she had already been bounced around to a few homes and they couldn't find somewhere that would keep her for good. Well, they knew that my family has always wanted a bulldog, and so they decided to call us up and see if we would take her in. Of course we said yes.
Since then Gilda has become a HUGE part of my life. She is like my little nurse. On days when I don't feel good and have to stay home she follows me' around and sleeps with me. She is golden. <3 Every time I wake up from a seizure I ask for her.
Point: Everyone needs a Gilda.
We got Gilda about 2 years ago from some friends of my moms who breed bulldogs. Gilda was only a year and a half years old, but she had already been bounced around to a few homes and they couldn't find somewhere that would keep her for good. Well, they knew that my family has always wanted a bulldog, and so they decided to call us up and see if we would take her in. Of course we said yes.
Since then Gilda has become a HUGE part of my life. She is like my little nurse. On days when I don't feel good and have to stay home she follows me' around and sleeps with me. She is golden. <3 Every time I wake up from a seizure I ask for her.
Point: Everyone needs a Gilda.
Friday, November 18, 2011
Do You NOT Hate It When...
1. Something bad is happening to someone you love very much, but you can't do anything for them.. Yeah. My boyfriend is nothing but amazing to me' and makes me smile like no other. But when he needs me, and when I'm supposed to be strong, I'm not. I get sick. I turn bratty. I just turn into what he needs the least in his life at the time. I love him so much, but I don't know how he loves me' after everything I have put him through.
2. The Chinese food you were expecting didn't taste as good as you wanted it to. Gah. I just wanted some crab rangoon... I wasn't expecting there to be REAL crab... It's freaking cheap Chinese food... Who uses real crab in fake Chinese food?!
3. You get your carpets clean and now the bottoms of your pajama pants are wet and you're laying in bed feeling sick and angry and now your ankles are cold due to wet pant bottoms. I swear. All it does it make my sheets wet and blah blah blah. It's annoying as heck. I just want it to dry.
4. You have that panicky feeling because you think you lost something uber important. Yeah, the Stanley Steemer guys came today and I thought my cat was going to be freaking out so I went to get her and hide her some place where she would be a tad less scared. They came at 6:00. We just found her 10 minutes ago. It is currently 10:40pm.
5. You get all comfortable in your bed and then you remember you have to do something? I forgot to turn off the Christmas lights hanging around my room. Yeah, it makes me feel magical. But it also annoys the crap out of me. No one likes a bunch of fairies pooping on their face when they're sleeping.
6. Nothing makes any sense. Need I say more?
Blah. I'm tired of today. Time to sleep and wake up to a hopefully better tomorrow... Where instead of having a don't you hate it list I will have a don't you love it with.
3MOREDAYSTILMAMMY!
2. The Chinese food you were expecting didn't taste as good as you wanted it to. Gah. I just wanted some crab rangoon... I wasn't expecting there to be REAL crab... It's freaking cheap Chinese food... Who uses real crab in fake Chinese food?!
3. You get your carpets clean and now the bottoms of your pajama pants are wet and you're laying in bed feeling sick and angry and now your ankles are cold due to wet pant bottoms. I swear. All it does it make my sheets wet and blah blah blah. It's annoying as heck. I just want it to dry.
4. You have that panicky feeling because you think you lost something uber important. Yeah, the Stanley Steemer guys came today and I thought my cat was going to be freaking out so I went to get her and hide her some place where she would be a tad less scared. They came at 6:00. We just found her 10 minutes ago. It is currently 10:40pm.
5. You get all comfortable in your bed and then you remember you have to do something? I forgot to turn off the Christmas lights hanging around my room. Yeah, it makes me feel magical. But it also annoys the crap out of me. No one likes a bunch of fairies pooping on their face when they're sleeping.
6. Nothing makes any sense. Need I say more?
Blah. I'm tired of today. Time to sleep and wake up to a hopefully better tomorrow... Where instead of having a don't you hate it list I will have a don't you love it with.
3MOREDAYSTILMAMMY!
Walmart...
One of the most awkward places to ever have a seizure is freakin WALMART. Yeah. So far I have only ha two there, but it doesn't make it any less awkward or embarrassing when I wake up.. Definitely not.
The first time I was like really tired and my heart rate was up and so I passed out and started seizing in the check out aisle. I woke up and somehow I had pillows around me and people were praying at me?! I was like PEOPLE, I'M OKAY. It was sooo awkward.
Then the other night it wasn't as bad but I woke up and there were a few Walmart employees standing around asking us if we needed anything... So of course I say, "Gilda!" (my english bulldog) and they all go, "..."
It was awkward.
The first time I was like really tired and my heart rate was up and so I passed out and started seizing in the check out aisle. I woke up and somehow I had pillows around me and people were praying at me?! I was like PEOPLE, I'M OKAY. It was sooo awkward.
Then the other night it wasn't as bad but I woke up and there were a few Walmart employees standing around asking us if we needed anything... So of course I say, "Gilda!" (my english bulldog) and they all go, "..."
It was awkward.
D:<
I am definitely not supposed to be awake right now. This was the day that I was suppose to go all day and now i can tell I am going to have to go in late. That is so dumb.
My dumb body clock needs new batteries. Every morning at like 5 it wakes me up, and normally I can go back to sleep but today IT WON'T LET ME. I don't understand!! Is it because I sleep with no pants on?! I refuse!!!!! PANTLESS SLEEP, FTW.
My dumb body clock needs new batteries. Every morning at like 5 it wakes me up, and normally I can go back to sleep but today IT WON'T LET ME. I don't understand!! Is it because I sleep with no pants on?! I refuse!!!!! PANTLESS SLEEP, FTW.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Well, crap.
GAH. I. Hate. Gardasil. So, this is the deal. I miss TONS of school. Like tons. I missed today, for instance, because I ended up passing out and seizing at Walmart last night and it totally killed my back. I can barely walk without crying it hurts so bad. ANNNYWAYS. When I started getting sick I was taking Algebra 1 (like most freshies do). Of course, after that, I had the worst time retaining knowledge... Apparently that isn't an uncommon thing for Gardasil Girls, but still. I ended up forgetting everything I had learned, and having to retake Algebra 1 in my Sophomore year. Basically, I am a year behind in math. Gag! I have no idea what is going on... Geometry is the DEVIL. I ended up having to do 11 make up assignments today... Which was like 12 pieces of paper... Goodness sakes I couldn't even walk afterwards, let alone think. So please, kids, stay at school and keep up with your math homework. You could end up like this girl. You don't want that life!! Haha.
Can anyone tell I'm on vicoden again?!
Can anyone tell I'm on vicoden again?!
Denial.
One of the things you don't want to be when you're sick: IN DENIAL.
At first that's all I was. I was thinking, "No, I'm not sick. This isn't happening to me. Not at all." But that just makes things worse. When you're in denial you can't take any steps towards making yourself better.. All you can do is sit there in your frustration. After I cane to terms that this WAS happening to me, I had to deal with the fact that it was going to keep happening for a while... I fact the last time I was in the hospital with wires taped to my head, they said this could be a lifelong thing. Well anyways, after that I figured I might as well suck it up, take it like Betty White (because she is one awesome woman) and KNOCK the heck out of this sickness.
After that things started looking up. Even though I'm still not great at it, I started listening to my body a little better.. And even though I am still sick, I'm not giving up hope that I will get better,
Lifelong condition, you say? I say FALSE.
In the words of Tate," You= Rocky Balboa. Sickness= WUSSY."
At first that's all I was. I was thinking, "No, I'm not sick. This isn't happening to me. Not at all." But that just makes things worse. When you're in denial you can't take any steps towards making yourself better.. All you can do is sit there in your frustration. After I cane to terms that this WAS happening to me, I had to deal with the fact that it was going to keep happening for a while... I fact the last time I was in the hospital with wires taped to my head, they said this could be a lifelong thing. Well anyways, after that I figured I might as well suck it up, take it like Betty White (because she is one awesome woman) and KNOCK the heck out of this sickness.
After that things started looking up. Even though I'm still not great at it, I started listening to my body a little better.. And even though I am still sick, I'm not giving up hope that I will get better,
Lifelong condition, you say? I say FALSE.
In the words of Tate," You= Rocky Balboa. Sickness= WUSSY."
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